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Xkill
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 6:25 pm |
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Joined: Wed Feb 11, 2004 1:43 am Posts: 797
Bot Check: GAMER
Website: http://www.freewebs.com/legion_of_valor/
Location: USA
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Following is a supposed letter of resignation from an employee at a computer company, to her boss, who apparently resigned very soon afterwards! It’s Funny, but a bit harsh!
Dear Mr. Smith,
As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.
Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time.
You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.
You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle. Since this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.
1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do it on your own.
2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.
3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your Mother's birthday," you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having to correct your mistakes.)
Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what you do with all that free time!
Wishing you a grand and glorious day,
Cecelia
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Carling
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 6:31 pm |
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Shard Supporter (Donated) |
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Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2004 8:12 pm Posts: 1124
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RvnScarlet
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 6:56 pm |
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Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:12 am Posts: 1253
Yahoo Messenger: redraven799
Location: North Carolina
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That's my boss in a nutshell.
_________________ Scarlet - Lady of the Lake [COLD]
Jackie Daniels - Liquid Death [COLD]
Vilee - Tamer in training [TLC]
Lumbie - I've got wood! [ACME]
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Von_Ogre
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 7:05 pm |
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Joined: Fri Sep 22, 2006 10:55 am Posts: 527
Website: http://www.myspace.com/dunby72
Location: The Duplex, USA
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yes yes YES!! That is AWESOME!!! ![Laughing :lol:](./images/smilies/icon_lol.gif)
_________________ Hating geeks is totally pointless because everyone depends on geeks -- you might as well hate air...
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In absentia luci tenebrae vincu
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kingblacktorn
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 7:14 pm |
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Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2004 10:19 pm Posts: 3197
Bot Check: GAMER
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rofl.... Awesome
_________________ Quote: A non-bob gm who shall remain nameless did it!
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theeggman
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 2:43 am |
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Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2004 7:03 am Posts: 493
Bot Check: GAMER
Website: http://www.sosariantales.com
Location: I is in Denmark now
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scary to think that somewhere out there is some faceless computer geek who's got the power to view your whole freetime activities and figure out who you are at the stroke of a few buttons.....and the fu***rs gettin paid for it too
_________________ If it looks too good to be true... it is
ingame Eggmungus , Ichabod & Festus
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flame
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 3:14 am |
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Joined: Tue Mar 07, 2006 4:59 pm Posts: 219
Location: Oregon
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owned
_________________ This is my signature: Quote: I take it back.. flame owns ![Rolling Eyes :roll:](./images/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif)
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mr.bell
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 7:37 am |
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Joined: Sun Dec 11, 2005 1:57 pm Posts: 465
Location: somewhere u would never wanna go
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hahahahaha thats sad and strange blackmail eh?
_________________ Quote: BTW, Ereaser, you spelt your forum name wrong from your in-game name.. lmfao
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